Sunday, February 10, 2008

Good Gracious...

I thought that I had posted this week... obviously not... today is such a crappy day. :( All I want to do is cry all day.... It has just been awful.... I have spent so much time thinking this weekend that it is not good for me... I wish that I did not have to think.. I think that part of it is that I am getting ready to file for the divorce and that just puts a finality to it.. and I just am not handling it well.. I think that when we said those vows it was for good and now here I am at it again... does anyone realize what a failure I feel like... i mean 2 divorces.... it sucks... what kind of person am I?? I never wanted to do this once let alone twice... I will never make it or be a good person... i just think that so many people are looking down on me.... :( It just SUCKS!!!! Someday in maybe 50 years it will be better... Somedays (like today) the only things that are good and to live for are my kids... but then they annoy me too sometimes.... wish that they did not have to see their dad... they come home all grumpy and mouthy... Got my income tax and went and spent over $200 on clothes for them and my son was disappointed and my daughter says... about time you got style like my dads girlfriend :( How low does that make me feel.....

Well enough rambling...

1 comment:

scrapperjen said...

You, my dear, are a strong woman who will survive this! You have friends who love you and are here for you!
Sending you tons of HUGS and lots of love!